I never thought I would be a price tag, walking around like a super model showing casing the latest tends but only focus is my sexual abilities with men I could easy mistaken to be my father without any biological and emotional connection.
My feet and eyes along with my ever changing passport can bring out jealously towards any travel agent as I have been everywhere you can think of without even writing a cheque for it. First Class? Please I give a whole new meaning to that. Like Jay Z, I was one to the next one before I could say I got a million ways to get it. My name is Zodwa for now and this is my story.
I remember this day as if it was yesterday. My friends and I went to town to window shop and pretend we had money to afford anything what we desired. A man who was dressed well in brands names I couldn’t even pronounce approached us and with a simple “Hello” we were all his attention. He told us stories about the big city life but I was only interested about Jozi the Gold City of South Africa. I wanted to know about it all, does it really have gold and are the houses and building made out of gold. He told me that I can make my dreams come true only if I get myself there and I will make my parents proud of me. The man told us that he is willing to help us in anyway free of charge and if we didn’t have family in the city, he will provide us with the accommodation expenses. With the political state of Zimbabwe, alongside my family income nothing was holding me back from embarking a journey that will lead me to riches, so I thought but to my surprise!
I packed my things and quietly got out of my house. I turned my back to take the last look at my house than continued to begin my journey. I met up with my friends at a nearby bus stop. He arrived and we got it but one of my friends Thandeka decided in the last minute to turn down the offer to go as she couldn’t picture leaving home without her parents’ blessings. I hugged and kissed her, “I promise I will come back, tell my parents that I had to do this for me and them.”
We arrived in Jozi and damn it was big, I mean everything was huge and I now knew why they called it the “Big City” filled with life. Suddenly the tone of the man changed as well his eys. He took us to this house crammed with other girls but they were in pretty bad shaped that made boxers themselves look sexy after a boxing match. They all had fear in their eyes, some even ashamed to even look as us. One girl came close to me and said” so what did the white man tell you?”
I told her the story with excitement next thing I know he whole room packed with girls laughed at me as if I was a standup comedian. ‘”You silly stupid girl, soon you will regret this but in a couple of months you will get used to it but at least he was creative with you, us on the other hand he was straight forward” the all said. My skin began to crumble and my hair stood up and I silently asked her to tell her story but she replied by saying “there is no point to tell you my revision because at the end our conclusions are the same, with the same characters”
After those words I couldn’t sleep one wink and started to question why I am here. Why these girls in these conditions and what did Pinky mean when she said I will regret but get over this experience. Morning came with the answers I was looking for that later was regretted for even been thought for. We were told to take off our clothes and I mean all off and walk up and down.those whom were still virgins were separated from those who have already been sexually active. Next we got new names, mine was Sara and told to get ready as I was leaving tomorrow, but where am I going because I am where I want to be, Johannesburg.
I and a couple of girls were taken to O.R Tambo International airport and were consciously remembered not to relieve our real names as trouble will occur if we did not obey the rules. We boarded the plane accompained of course by three men. The plane flew to Durban and that’s how I entered in to the world of human trafficking, the beginning of my nightmare. We were at work the minute we landed, got taken to dinner by high profile men some maybe you know but will not mention them as that will cause a battle I am not ready to fight. The man I was assigned to seem nice, he took me back to his place and we had dinner. For the first few months I thought I was in heaven but suddenly the dinner stopped and the shopping. One night he came into my room and demanded sex. I said no, that answer was responded by a slap right across the face. He asked again but I still maintained my answer next thing I know he was on top of me and began what he wanted to do all along with me. There, my first was my first rape and there was more to come of course with other men. I hate myself everyday not because the men that I was sold to every now and then raped and treated me like a dg but I hated myself because I was so stubborn. Why did I believe the man that promised me a better life? Why didn’t I get off the car like Thandeka? I should have not agreed to this at all but I could have been or should have been were not going to help me or every night I started to dream on how I will escape.
It was Friday and that was the day where we made most money and it was going to be my lucky day. My customer of course came to pick up his product, if only he knew that it would be his last. After dinner we went home to have sex, so he thought. While he was getting in the mood, I turned around and stabbed him in the chest over and over again. I kept on thinking about my first night, how I was raped and where men treated me even less of a human being. I am not sorry for what I did in fact I would do it again in a heartbeat. My name is Zodwa used to known as Sara, and I am a human trafficking and rape survivor.
